Photo by FotoFlo on Unsplash The question of how to help your child when they are between two homes due to a divorce or a custody agreement is one that is often brought about in the counseling field. Coparenting is what happens when parents are divorced and custody is split whether this custody is fifty/fifty, or one parent has primary while the other is secondary. Whatever special arrangement that you have, the...
Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash Grief or loss is a part of life. It can mean loss of a job, family member, close friend or even witnessing a tragic event that results in the loss of life. Everyone processes life events differently. I hear often, “I haven’t cried yet” or “Everyone around me is emotional and I feel nothing, what is wrong with me? Everyone responds differently to grief, some more...
Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash I am consistently receiving texts from my child. Please come and get me. Please let me leave. Please don’t make me go to this social event. Please don’t make me stay for this assignment. It is a benefit that your child has their cell phone at school so that you can contact them to know that they are safe. However, it can become a burden on...
Photo by engin akyurt on Unsplash Do not be discouraged if you and your spouse disagree on how to parent your children. Conflict in marriage is expected and normal. Likewise, conflict in parenting is expected and normal. I would absolutely be concerned if there was no conflict in your marriage or parenting relationship. If there is no conflict this is a sign to seek professional help immediately, because someone is lying and...
Respect in any relationship cannot be understated. When it comes to the parent child relationship, respect is the foundation. There are a lot of dynamics within the parent child relationship, which are respect mutual admiration, and unconditional love. All of these factors are dynamic and they play off of each other. It’s often said that respect isn’t respect given. This is very true in a lot of relationships. However, within the parent...
Why is parenting so hard? Parenting is a journey that many sign up for and have no idea what lies ahead. Other times the parenting journey begins unexpectedly, whether you were planning on having kids or not, adoption or kinship care. No matter how your parenting journey begins, whether it was planned or unplanned there’s always help and support. It can be rewarding. It can also be the most costly journey you...
Photo by Steinar Engeland on Unsplash School avoidance is a common issue, since COVID-19. Before then, it was a rarity. Kids have long since had issues of school avoidance and refusal, but it was not recognized as a major issue that needed attention. There are several steps in helping your child who is struggling with school avoidance. The first is to recognize what is really going on. Mental health days is a...
Photo by Aleks Dahlberg on Unsplash When a parent or guardian discovers that their child is self-harming, many things can run through their mind. Is my child wanting to die? Is my child wanting attention? Has something happened that I don’t know about? What could I have done to prevent this? What do we do now? These are comments that as a counselor, I hear regularly. No one discovers that their child...
Sometimes our kids know better. From generation to generation there are differences from social, emotional and cultural. These differences need to be acknowledged and respected. Just because things are different doesn’t mean that they are wrong. Parents are seen as the authority and decision maker, no matter what. But what happens when our kids know better than we do? Do we acknowledge this insight and let our kids make their own decision?...
Photo by Ksenia Makagonova on Unsplash The old saying is true, when my child hurts, I hurt. The first instinct is to jump in and rescue them from the situation then shield them from any future hurt or side effects. This is what parents are supposed to do, right? I would never want my child to feel like I am not supportive and 100% for them. I want to take away their...
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